March Chaos
Hockey is happening every other day. We are travelling further for playoffs and playing games with less breaks, planning wind ups and practices or coaches gifts, bad roads or weather and all while spending time with towns and parents talking about ball that is only a few short weeks away. Somewhere in there you have school - is it Spirit week again?? - parent teacher interviews, sore throats and coughs, sky rocketing gas prices, OH! and we have jobs. Does this extra curricular really seem worth it?
Here's the thing
I was thinking about this the other day, does this look crazy to people. Don't answer, it's rhetorical.
Neighbours see we are never home, I only see friends and family at the rink. The only people I'm speaking to on the phone is whoever is coordinating the next season of sport or a teammate and how we are getting to the next game. We are basically living minute to minute, and hey, when was the last time the kids had a bath??
Honestly it gets to be a lot and I'd be lying if some days I wasn't taking deep breaths just to try and calm my mind a bit.
But not for one second do I want to change it.
The following is like a journal entry or internal conversation reminding myself why we do the crazy, deal with the chaos, and do it all over again year after year.
Relationships
The girls are learning relationships outside their regular routine. Interacting with new people on their team, new locations, different backgrounds, but all together for one reason. The love of the game. They are getting opportunities to connect with someone with the same passion. They are learning different things from people outside of their family, teachers and friends; teammates can be a game changer. Team mates turning into friends and seeing familiar faces in other towns make you feel welcomed or included in places otherwise you wouldn't have the opportunity. I could add a whole section on networking here. "oh I used to play (insert sport here) with them years ago, I think I have their contact still, let me ask them about (topic of discussion later in life) If you work in any field, connections are important.
BODIES
How to fuel and take care of their body so it can keep up and carrying on under pressure. A regular topic in our house is how to give your body what it needs so it can have the energy to do what you want it to do. Are we giving it what it needs to stay healthy when there are many other stresses at hand. Don't forget to drink your water and eat your fruit and veggies today girls! as they rush out the door for school. Ellis will eat her meat and pasta and then show me how big her muscles are and how strong she is. This is likely less for her sport skills and more so that she's not taken lightly around the house. She wants her sisters to know she likes to be the boss around here. It's very important my girls grow up knowing that physical activity and eating isn't about making your body look a certain way. It's about allowing you to live the life you want to live and have the body carry you through that with success. Sport allows an example they can see and feel for themselves in real time.
PERSERVERENCE AND BETTERMENT
As our oldest moves up in age groups, the competition starts to become more prevalent. While she is a very low key type of girl, this conversation will likely be more at play with the younger two. But the odd time we talk about how she felt she performed. This is a great way to talk about her own betterment. Comparisons to herself and how she can improve compared to her last performance. Less often we chat about her play time. If it's down or if it's up. Did you deserve that? Were you happy with it? If not, how can you become the player your coach can rely on? If you don't put in the work outside of game time, what else is the expectation. If you aren't putting in extra work are you ok with the play time that would go along with that commitment. Teaching her that she will get what she puts in is the goal, but also that if she doesn't, that's life and how will you handle it? Will you take responsibility or slough it off.
Is there someone else better than you even if you put in more work? Well that's the way the cookie crumbles my tiny friend. You can't be the best at everything and there's something to say about building up your teammates and friends when they excel instead. You will find something you at excel at too, and you'll hope they clap for you in that moment.
COMPETITION OR ENEMIES?
Competitive nature, intensity and wanting to win isnt' to be mistaken for hate for the other team. We can want to win and still be polite and civil to other players and teams. After all this is a game we are apart of. Healthy competition in life is a good thing. Lose? Did you handle it with grace and appreciation for the other team's efforts or skills? Win? super, were you humble and respectful and again aware of the other teams efforts and skills?
As they get older; do you disagree with someone else in life? Great, we won't have the same values as everyone else, that doesn't mean we hate them. We simply disagree. How boring would like be if we didn't have competition.
Learn to co-exist.
BACK TO TEAMMATES
Are you tired or not feeling it for tonights game? That's fair, but listen kid, you've got team mates to show up for. This team has shown up for you when they aren't feeling it, and now it's time to do the same for them.
When you join a team, you immediately sign a pact. We are in this together working towards the same goal. When you aren't feeling it, I got your back and when I'm not feeling it you got mine. All we ask is that we show up for each other and give our best and prepare our best for this moment. We respect and honour that when someone has a bad game or wasn't their normal self, that it's ok, because you know that's human. In our hearts we know they gave what they could, because we've built that trust with one another. That means, doing what we can so that we can show up for each other in that way (refer back to bodies and perseverance titles). And when your teammate shows up and give their best and that's better than yours, you are proud of them. Graciously allow others to be better than you and graciously allow others to have off days... because my girl, that's what they would do for you.
JOURNAL ENTRY COMPLETE
I don't know the proper way to write in a journal.. that's apparent. But I hope my thoughts were somewhat coherent. I want this to feel as thought I'm speaking with you, not at you. There was a lot of rambling, writing was never my strong suit. Regardless, did any of this resonate with you?
Take it with a grain of salt
This is what I've grown up with. I've lived the benefits of sport, butI've also seen the bad. I'm not so blinded by the positive that I don't see the negative. It's time consuming, tiring, the politics and those who like to think everyone else is out to screw them over (if you just thought, but we really are getting screwed over....my friend, kindly look in the mirror) and if you talk to anyone in March about hockey season, you can bet someone in their house is also battling a sickness.
What I'm trying to get across here is why we do the things we do, is that the positives seem to be so heavily life skill related. Aside from school and home life, sports is another tool that is FUN and helps our kids prepare for their life as an adult.
I understand sports are not the be all - end all and that there are other ways to get these skills. I'm just saying, when you don't see my car in the drive way and I've said we are away on a road trip for the umpteenth time, it's because it's work for us, even if its a bit crazy.
Tell me your experience
Are you still in it? or still recovering from a long season.
I'm proud of you. I see the sacrifices you are making to keep everything moving. Your work here is important. Keep going.
Get in touch
Tell it to me straight, did you need the reminders I needed?